Jumble of Thoughts

My sister meditates regularly and her thoughts and questions this morning prompted me to write this post. She relayed to me a Tim Ferriss podcast she was going to listen to about being overwhelmed by information and how to know what to take in and what not to and why.

She said that with returning to a more regular meditation practice recently she has practised the, ‘gone’ meditation and loving kindness. There is so much good information coming to her around meditation that she said she has been sitting to meditate with a jumble of thoughts over what to choose to meditate on.

She asked, “how do I know what makes sense for me and what to choose and how to choose it? How do I not be overwhelmed and over loaded? I know I can’t choose everything, but I want to.”

I was driving at the time I was listening to this (my sister lives on the other side of the world in California and we Vox [walkie talkie messaging] every morning) and so I pondered on it for a while. Instead of voxing back my thoughts like I usually would, my sister’s thoughts and questions inspired me to put this into a blog – thank you Mel 🙂

It didn’t come to me until this evening that the answer is actually in the question (often the case). The ‘how’ (as in how do I know what to choose, what makes sense) is not of our concern, just the intention. My dad used to say to us, ‘yours is not to reason why, yours is just to do or die.’ He didn’t mean it literally, well at times perhaps he did, but apart from the ‘die’ bit of that saying, there is great truth in it. The what, where, why and how of things really isn’t our concern. It can be left for the more infinite power of the universe to take care of.

When you sit to meditate, although you may have a jumble of thoughts or several ideas about what you should or shouldn’t be meditating on, truly your overall intention is just to meditate, right?

So it doesn’t matter how or what you are meditating on. If you think about that, it allows a sense of freedom and relaxation in just simply sitting and being; allowing the flow of meditation to carry you on whatever journey it takes.

When we meditate, we connect on a level of energy with universal energy; the infinite power of the universe, god or whatever you like to view that as. It is this connection that really enables the ‘hows’ of everything to be taken care of.

Remember, to meditate is to focus your attention fully upon something. At times when I meditate, I have a clear intention. One could argue that this negates the act of meditating, but at times I seek solutions or answers and I am clear on that. I don’t have an expectation or an outcome, but I might know I am going to meditate on ‘gone’ or something I am looking for guidance in. If answers come (they always do at some point) in the meditation, great, but if they don’t then that’s great too. I usually find that my path to this decision also comes from within and unless I feel that intention clearly, I let it go. I remind myself as the Buddha said, in the absence of grasping, one is set free.

Often times, however, I don’t have an intention. I just trust that what comes is meant to be. If that is a jumble of thoughts, where I am actually thinking about what to choose and what to focus my meditation on, then I will simply allow that, and I keep returning my focus to the breath. In doing this the thoughts dissipate.

Meditation creates space and separates the jumble of thoughts. Think about your mind being a garden cluttered with autumn leaves (thoughts). Meditation is like the wind, swirling gently between the pile of leaves and blowing them, until they scatter further apart and finally blow away. Truly clearing your mind.

When you realise you are where you are meant to be, what is right for you at the time will come. Meditation brings clarity of mind and a calm approach to thinking; over time thoughts don’t seem to come as fast as they used to and they seem far less jumbled. It isn’t so much that your thinking has slowed down, more that the quality of  your thoughts has accelerated. Thoughts become sharper and focused, more relevant.

There is no wrong or right way to meditate and every day is different. The jumble of thoughts and wanting to focus on so many things to meditate on and bring good things into your life is truly a beautiful thing. Simply notice that during your meditation, returning your focus to the breath. Allow the meditation practice of doing that, unravel the jumble. If it doesn’t feel clearer during that meditation, it will later that day, or during the next one, or the next one. There is no rush, you are where you are meant to be. There is great peace in that. It is a consistent practice that will create space and clarity of mind.

If you find that your meditation is focusing on the racing jumble of thoughts rather than your breath, then that’s ok. You are focusing on something! If you follow this jumble of thoughts for a short time in your mind,  you will naturally settle back to your breath. Thinking is exhausting.

The breath is your centre,  your life force and power within. It is the gateway that connects you to higher levels of consciousness and universal energy. It simply requires your focus and practice…

Breathe in, breathe out.

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